(Can't see the punch line, old timer? [me either] Click the image to make it bigger.)Bizarro is brought to you today by Psychodelic Sex.
You might expect me to say that I don't like these "your speed" signs, that they are just another step toward the "Big Brother" society so chillingly described by George Orwell in his masterpiece, 1984. (For those of you too young to remember, Orwell was right – that year was freaky!)
But truth be told, I like these signs. Not because I want to stop people from speeding, like that PTA-power-crazed mom in your neighborhood who secretly wants to be dictator of the world so her children will never experience a single unpleasantness, but precisely because I am the speeder. Because those signs work and slow drivers down instantly, you can bet there are no cops hiding nearby. So I just step on the gas and see how high I can make the fluorescent numbers go.
Regarding the other three signs, I don't care how old people are or their Facebook habits, but I think it might be fun to have an I.Q. sign. It might just take a little of the piss out of that redneck in the Dodge Ram pickup who just blew past you on the entrance ramp.
Speaking of Facebook: if anyone reading this has ever sent me a message on Facebook, please don't expect an answer. I only go on their once every few weeks to click "accept" on the friendship requests and "ignore" on all the other stuff as fast as possible, then I'm off. I'm happy to have a personal correspondance with you, but please direct it to my email address, which can be found at Bizarro.com.
That being said, I'm around a month behind on emails, so please don't send anything frivolous like, "Why is there a piece of pie in Wednesday's cartoon?" The answer to that is on Bizarro.com, too. Just click "Secret Symbols" at the bottom of the home page.
Thank you for reading. May you always travel with the wind to your back and may your body's bacteria be beneficial.
29 comments:
Yes, high IQ people probably don't drive Dodge Rams but the question is how low will the number go for the people who do?
I used to work with some wickedly intelligent people, one person in particular impressed me instantly. She was hired to design the optics on a "Star Wars" satellite and when I asked her about her optics background her answer was, "I have none, I just read the book last night, it is rather easy don't you think?" It was all really humbling.
But there was this quality I loved, not one person ever mentioned how smart they were. To an intelligent person IQ means nothing. Today when someone tells me they are thinking of joining MENSA my answer is "I thought about joining DENSA once - I think their parties would be more fun." They usually end up with the deer in the headlight look trying to figure out what DENSA means.
bizarro bloggers ..
over the past many weeks i occasionally sent a letter to jeremy on here questioning his thoughts and motives,,
ive laughed on many occasions when him and piraro seem close ....only to jeremy say whats on his mind the next panel and wonder when piraro is going to go off ..
ive talked on line through meesenger the past week and laughed seing jeremy is the person behind the real quotes..
another words...my motto is being from a wealthy family means i dont have to say i like sally forth ..
if i was broke id tell dan he was the greatest cartoonist outside of him and your both the best ..
what i mean by that is if dan dont acknowledge me cause hes friends with the creators then so be it ..ill be alright and there is no financial ruin
you have to respect a guy who supports three kids and is willing to lay it out on the line for what he believes in on any given day or quote..
meaning ...l am who i am and thats how it is
even if the boss goes against his beliefs..
i made conmmenst on religion he stood by his beliefs and made comments about vegeterian and found out he was:)
he stuck to his beliefs and left it like that
i brought up past blogs where he was instigated on here to bite between him and duffau and didn't ..
lets just say jeremy outside of mike duffau ..probaly the only real blogger on here ..
iseedtoo you are schizo or someting youve been everything from piraros 5 foot 8 to 6 foot 5 ....you ve been everywhere from age 25 to 65 ..
with this all being said anonymous...tell us who you are ?
derek:
If you find where I may have said I was 5'8", which I even doubt I said that, it would be where Dan was joking about his height or I was joking about Dan's height (or lack of). I am 6'5".
Never have I said my age on here. If you look on my blog page you will see that I mention the photo is of my grandpa taken over 50 years ago and I like it. But I am between 25 and 65 and have had an incredible and amazing life. I am consistent, I tell the truth, and nothing is made up.
I also don't attack people unless the idiot or idiots attack me first.
But the question I have, is why do people rant about other people on here? Outside of Anonymous always being in Dan's face about the comic, I totally agree with him. Who cares if he is called Anonymous or Bob? We all know he has a bone to pick about Dan for some reason and that is good enough. I don't need to see a resume of everyone who posts, why do you or others?
Posting on here at times is like being a counselor at a band camp for only tuba players that is surrounded by a cheerleader camp. A bunch of guys that can only look but never touch in a pissing contest.
hey isee3po...i think derek is also anonymous.
Fido (actually I like Difo):
No, Anonymous uses capital letters, correct punctuation, and I admit his/her gammer is usually right on. Anonymous has a anal retentive correction gene, this is a sign of a good editor. Anonymous could never post a long diatribe like Derek did without a single capitalization, it would destroy Anonymous. Anonymous is also a critic meaning he almost always goes for the negative and praising someone in a blog is not a critic's style. All of that I say with admiration in that Anonymous is very good at being Anonymous.
Now you, on the other hand, could easily be Derek based solely on lack of capitalization, however you like to go for the jugular, the quick kill. The Fido attack is never more than three lines outside of the catch phrase and this makes your identity a little bit harder to determine. Until one looks at the end of the sentences. Derek uses ".." and ",," two periods or two commas. Hmm... that is a very hard trait to break and if look at yesterday's Fido's comment in Humpty Dumpty you use ",," and ".." therefore we can now say that Fido is Derek. Bad dog, you dropped your bone.
I think everybody that comments here has an IQ that falls within 2 standard deviations of the mean, but I could be wrong.
Quoting a peanuts/ Charley Brown episode on the TV "..mwa-mwa-mwa..." is all I see when you all ramble on and on and on....
But as to the speed signs... I do the same. But I know that I will get caught one of these days because, in my little world, they are usually set in the school zones. But catch me after dark... and I will rev up to 50+ then back to 10 and back up while amusing myself. (spousal unit thinks it is sad entertainment but...)
hahahahah
unlike fido 1...i knew i had it down
the obvious?..you decide
you freaken told...?
as most of you my know my grandpa or as they say in french pepere possesses a virgin ass...
im joshthecartoonguy2
NO IT MEANS IF I TYPE LIKE THIS IM ALSO JULIE AND JEREMY
as most of you may know my grandpa or as they say in french pepere possesses a viigin ass ..
sorry derek it just looked so obvious
Derek is also Sayotte316 or that is his significant other's account and he uses it from time to time.
The .. and ,, shows up in Sayotte's posts when they are in lower case, but then sometimes capitals are used and the period and comma are just that.
I have never seen anyone use ,, and .. before and it sticks out when you read a long post.
AS MOST OF YOU MAY KNOW MY PEPERE POSSESSES A VIRGIN ASS!!!!!!
never call isee3dto a schizo....lol..he ruined his whole superbowl playing detective :)
NOW TONIGHT WHEN I GO TO BED IM STILL WEALTHY,OWNER OF TONS OF PIRARO ORIGINALS AND 5 FOOT 11 NOT 5 FOOT 8
DO YOU FUCK YOUR PEPERE IN PHOTO?
isee,
you got me so scared man ..i couldnt sleep last night what am i gonna do ..
my paragraph typing is similar to yours to ...what the fuck?
will my trust fund disappear ...will i have to go to work ..i just dont know what im gonna do?..
plus having your peperes ass on my mind..
you just got me so scared i dont know what to do ..
Today's comments read much like a Leo Tolstoy, novel. I enjoy watching commentators argue. I know it's childish and PBO wants us to stop all of this.
I must protest to the blog administrator however, such language as “"..mwa-mwa-mwa..."” should never be allowed on the Internet!
I'm also concerned that this blog would allow quotes from the terrorist Charlie Brown. “Peanuts” has been contaminated and has killed 8 people in recent weeks.
The quality of this blog is deteriorating rapidly, therefore I will oversee Dan’s facebook for the God-fearing, red meat eaters!
And will someone please put FIDO’s virgin ass french grandpa out of his misery.
as most of you may know my grandpa or as they say in french pepere possesses a virgin ass..
isn't that the truth...shucks
WOW! A psychological melodrama!!!
In today's and yesterday's comments we are seeing a range of psychological issues, from (delusions of grandeur) to (paranoid schizophrenia)! It's clearly time to call Dr. Phil.
I want it to be clearly noted to every commentator here! {There's only room enough, for one PSYCHO in this binary town!} Although I was not here first I clearly carry the biggest binary stick. So you other psychotics have until high noon, to get out of town!
Don't make me draw my six shooter, DON’T! You know, I'll do it!
Black,
this room is all yours to tidy up. But watch where you step.
The funny thing is, at least up in Edmonton, the cops started to put photoradar right after those signs so you knew exactly how much you got pinged for.
In certain parts of Pennsylvania they also post your fine beside your speed. I always wanted to stop and leave a check so I could continue with impunity.
Wow, you don't visit a blog for a couple days... All I'll say is this - I believe the shortcomings of Piraro's comics of late are due to a lack of effort, of mailing it in. And that is what I call him on. As his comics in the past have shown, he is capable of better.
There is a 15 Mph sign near my house that flashes if it detects that you are driving faster than that. It is right as you turn past my old High School. I didn't know why it flashed sometimes until I noticed a bus go by it real slow and when I drove by it flashed.
much spilled ink, very little clarity....but the cartoon was funny. leave the comedy to professionals guys and gals.
Doug -
Do you know who the professionals are and aren't? No, you don't. So let's leave the posting of comments to the professionals, eh?
My aunt is one of those women who try to keep people from speeding in her neighborhood. Thing is, her two children were killed by a speeding driver a few years ago, so I guess you wouldn't call her a "PTA-crazed mom."
She likes your strip, but I'm glad she doesn't read your blog.
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