(Can't see the punch line, old timer? [me either] Click the image to make it bigger.)
Bizarro is brought to you today by Psychodelic Sex.
You might expect me to say that I don't like these "your speed" signs, that they are just another step toward the "Big Brother" society so chillingly described by George Orwell in his masterpiece, 1984. (For those of you too young to remember, Orwell was right – that year was freaky!)
But truth be told, I like these signs. Not because I want to stop people from speeding, like that PTA-power-crazed mom in your neighborhood who secretly wants to be dictator of the world so her children will never experience a single unpleasantness, but precisely because I am the speeder. Because those signs work and slow drivers down instantly, you can bet there are no cops hiding nearby. So I just step on the gas and see how high I can make the fluorescent numbers go.
Regarding the other three signs, I don't care how old people are or their Facebook habits, but I think it might be fun to have an I.Q. sign. It might just take a little of the piss out of that redneck in the Dodge Ram pickup who just blew past you on the entrance ramp.
Speaking of Facebook: if anyone reading this has ever sent me a message on Facebook, please don't expect an answer. I only go on their once every few weeks to click "accept" on the friendship requests and "ignore" on all the other stuff as fast as possible, then I'm off. I'm happy to have a personal correspondance with you, but please direct it to my email address, which can be found at Bizarro.com.
That being said, I'm around a month behind on emails, so please don't send anything frivolous like, "Why is there a piece of pie in Wednesday's cartoon?" The answer to that is on Bizarro.com, too. Just click "Secret Symbols" at the bottom of the home page.
Thank you for reading. May you always travel with the wind to your back and may your body's bacteria be beneficial.