Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Discriminating Readers

Bizarro is brought to you today by the Chihuahuaitis Awareness Foundation.

Far too few Americans know anything about the heartbreaking syndrome called "Chihuahuaitis." Perhaps it is because Elephantitis grabs the lion's share of the headlines when it comes to deformities named for animals.

Some common misconceptions about those suffering from Chihuahuaitis:
1. Because their head is so small, many people assume they have a diminished intellect. Nothing could be further from the truth. In fact, because their brains are concentrated in a smaller area they work faster and more efficiently, like with concentrated cleaners and juices, and most score higher on standardized I.Q. tests than their "normal-headed" counterparts.
2. Because some or all of their "parts" are smaller than average, people often assume they have physical limitations. While this is occassionally true (a tiny Chihuahua-sized body with normal-sized feet can limit one's mobility, for instance), for the most part they are able to participate normally in all of the activities that anyone else can. Sometimes their small size can even be a benefit. Spelunking is one example – a person with Chihuahuaitis can explore parts of a cave that average-sized people can not fit into.

The squeaky quality of their voices can also be a problem for them. Many people report being annoyed by their so-called "barking" and have difficulty understanding what the person is saying. With a little patience you can discern their words, however, and if all else fails, just give them a treat. That's more than likely what they were yapping about anyway.

I hope that cartoons like this will urge readers to consider the feelings and needs of those with Chihuahuaitis more carefully and help to make strides toward integrating them more fully into society.


FixedXorBroken said...

When I saw the picture, I thought the joke would be that it was a buh caricature gon too far.

Shortcake said...

paris hilton has already begun to makes strides toward integrating them more fully into society by placing them in her purse and wearing giant bug-eye sunglasses. but i think that is the common side effect of sleeping on platinum bed-sheets with a silver spoon in her mouth.

SAYOTTE316 said...

Mike duffau dead at 35

Mike Duffau said...

My first stalker...haha!

SAYOTTE316 said...


your alive cool shit man jeremy started telling me you were dead, he spread it all over the blogspot after the big fight you guys had .

docmayhem said...

So you probably did it on purpose but the anal retentive medical student in me has to say: Elephantitis is not a disease. It is Elephan- TIASIS.

Sorry about that, I just had to get it out. *off to flagellate himself in shame*

docmayhem said...

Now, Chihuahuaitis is definitely a medical condition, and a serious one at that. Currently, the world is trapped in the grips of a Chihuahuaitis pandemic the likes of which have never been seen. Unfortunately, a cure has still not been found.

bill said...

Don't tell me you got a chihuahua.
Oh geez.

Who said...

Did you know that chihuahuas have a permanent split down the center of there skull? In the center of that center it's soft tissue... like a baby's soft spot. Except it never closes up.

derekamalo said...

question 3 on mass voting about the dog track..
.i remember as a kid wonderland race track and even raynam taunton racetrack in mass..
in rhode island there is a racetrack called lincoln greyhound park and now it is known as twin rrivers has five days worth of greyhound racing ...i keep hearing though that the slot machine revenue is what the state is after and the dog area for betters gets smaller and samller who knows even if there is a vote in ri to get rid of it its mob connected so itll be tough

i dont believe in dog racing either not for the fact that they are runnimng and fed well but treated in cramped housinng negelected after they retire..if you walk on the grounds about a quarter mile from the track area you can see the cage dwellings they live in pretty pathetic

we adopted two greyhounds from here actually in the mid 90's they do make loyal and great pets ..howvever they are not for kids..better off for older people companionship

as far as voting for gays to marry ...i say why not they are taxpapers and monogamy should be encouraged not discouraged

Lorie said...

Exciting election! Wow. Prop 8 not passing here is a disappointment, but I did recycle my sign.

This was upsetting - "bill passed in AR that bans any unmarried couple from adopting or fostering a child"

Mmm. Since over 50% of marriages end in divorce, I can see why this makes sense.

Jeremy said...

Absolutely Lorie! How could two people of the same sex love each other?! It would have to be lust and they would just have sex in front of the kid all the time.

Honestly though I think it is ridiculous. Gay parents will not turn their (foster) kids gay. They are shooting themselves in the cleft feet with this. They should be opening the doors for more loving foster parents, not closing doors to perfectly capable loving people. Its sick, its wrong, its anti-intellectual. Just like Sarah Palin's Republican party.

Didn't know Africa was a continent indeed!!

Robert Finis said...

A bad day for gay rights across the country. As one prejudice shows signs of clearing, another gets thicker. Sad.

There's my usual bitterness! Welcome back, friend (asshole)!

I remember chihuahuas used to show up a lot in old (late 90's?) bizarros. I would welcome the return of the sarcastic, high strung dog of irony!