Monday, June 9, 2008

Mind-Boggling Beauty

Bizarro is brought to you today by Facial Fabrications of Beverly Hills.

I have ambivalent feelings about cosmetic surgery. On the plus side, for people with severe deformities or injuries, it is tremendously useful and completely warranted.

On the other hand, the way so many rich people end up looking like bad drawings of themselves in their golden years is creepy. Any time someone chops you up with a blade and rearranges you, it is dangerous, and the thought that so many people will pay bucks-a-go-go to risk their life for a slight age reduction – under the best of circumstances – is mind boggling.

Then again, if it were not for the vain and wealthy, a lot of the techniques used on deformities would not have been created. Joan Rivers alone has personally funded untold amounts of research in this area.

On the down side again, it teaches us as a society that aging is somehow wrong.

On the up side, the parts taken from Michael Jackson's nose were used to create new noses for three children born without any.

I vote "no" on unnecessary cosmetic surgery, but I didn't always hold this opinion. Back in 1996, I had my forehead extended and have been really happy with the results.


ging said...

Unbelievable. How to deal with mommy's new face.

"3 Thighs" Piraro said...

Holy cow, I had no idea. That blows me away.
Thanks for sending the link.

melissa said...

Holy shit! I'd forgotten that Joan Rivers was a total betty back in the day.

And thanks to ging, I'm about to lose my Amy's palak paneer lunch on my keyboard.

Tanja said...

ging, I'm speechless.

Tanja said...

...this is from the product description:

"As any parent will tell you - children are very perceptive. It is nearly impossible to hide a plastic surgery transformation from your children."

"Finally, when the bandages come off and mommy looks somewhat different, their confusion may lead to responses that adults may find inappropriate or hard to understand."

I like the way they say "somewhat".

julie said...

Yikes! That book that ging linked to is something...

I can see a future Bizarro cartoon: "And this is our most popular package: it includes a face lift, breast enlargement, tummy tuck, and 20 hours of psychiatric counseling for your family who no longer recognizes you."

Ginger said...

to the post ~ hahahahahahahaha!!!

to the link that ging provided ~ truly disturbing. i feel a little sick now.

did you have to choose ging as a username because i already took ginger? sorry.

Karl said...

Why do we hear of so many women going through these cosmetic surgeries? Is it because of low self esteem, or just wanting to show off “The Goods” so to speak? Perhaps it’s an attempt to recapture lost youth. Whatever the reason, other than correcting severe disfigurement, is it really making that person happy? I seriously doubt it. If a person takes care of their body, by eating properly and exercising regularly, then a few wrinkles only adds character not age. And who needs bigger boobs anyway? Just ask anyone who has to lug them around for a few years (not that I’ve had this problem personally) surely, you’ll hear them complain of backaches and a poor golf swing.

A couple of quick thoughts; Are breast implants safe for the environment, meaning; are they biodegradable? And do they really use plastic in “plastic” surgery, and if so, is it the recyclable kind?

One thing I love about Dan’s cartoons; they really get you to thinking.