Thursday, February 3, 2011

Crazy Couch

Bizarro is brought to you today by Dog Walker.

Have you ever been up sh*t creek without a paddle? (I cleverly added the * to that word so that it would be family friendly. Everyone knows that children are no good at Wheel of Fortune.)

Of course you have, we all have. And the message of this cartoon is to pay more attention to your paddle than to your wardrobe. Of course, if you're up sh*t creek without a paddle, this advice is useless. And if you're out canoeing in one of those smiley face shirts, you deserve whatever you get because everybody hates those things. Unless you're wearing it ironically, in which case you probably deserve to be visited by hillbillies, ala Deliverance. (Wow, that was bitter. I didn't know until I typed this how much pent up aggression I have toward ironic shirts.)

This cartoon about light reading is a bit of nonsense with no particular message. Unless it would be that if you find yourself bored enough to read the ends of light bulbs over and over, it's probably time to quit your job, leave your wife, and go on a violent odyssey of some sort, ala Going Native, by Stephen Wright. (One of my favorite books, but not written by the Steven Wright who is a stand-up comedian and not funny.)

As long as we're discussing my damaged psyche, let's take a quick visit to Sigmund's Couch. I quite like this old cartoon from 1997, written and drawn two years after my divorce and the most therapy-intensive period of my life. Notice you can read "ID" on the sign above the door to rhyme with "bid," which is a Freudian term! Hahahahahahah! Also notice that back then I was often drawing the cartoon outside the borders. I did it because I liked it, I stopped doing it for reasons unknown. Probably laziness.

Let's hear it from all those readers who have enjoyed psychotherapy at some point in their lives. I only go when I'm really troubled, but I have to admit I love it. Something so soothing about talking about myself for 45 minutes without fear of interruption.

If you'd like to see these cartoons on various fine tidbits of merchandise, just click the 'toon. It's fun and painless!

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7 comments:

Bradley Avakian said...

I enjoyed all three of these ditties. I am currently attending weekly therapy sessions to ease my aching brain, however, they will be ending in two weeks because I will have used up my allotted free student passes for the program. Basically, I am my therapist's homework as she earns her Master's degree. She has been very helpful to me and she tapes the sessions and watches them with some interested faculty member. Anyway, hearing that a brilliant artist such as yourself benefits from and enjoys such practices gives me comfort and I suspect that the rambling that is currently being typed by my digits is being fueled by the anxiety that is welling up in me as my sessions come to a close.
Also, I have a complaint. While I much enjoy the opportunity to view and purchase Bizarro merchandise, I very much miss the enlarged image that I could previously view by clicking upon a toenail or a bird beak or some such object.
Thank you and farewell.

Stacy said...

Sadly, we are forbidden to see the representation of your damaged psyche on postmodernbarney.com.

Plan 9 Studios said...

My wife is a therapist and she pins up all your head-shrink related gags by her desk. I hope that makes you feel great that someone uses your work for amusement and decoration without paying you.

I think her all time favorite is the one where Frankenstein is in group therapy and tearing up the place while the therapist asks if anyone wants to comment on his ability to deal with anger. F*cking classic. (I didn't want to write the word fuck - I hope you understand).

Prospero said...

I must admit, therapy was the best thing I ever did for myself. There's no shame in seeking answers to the things which trouble us most.

nicklord said...

Did you mean Steven wright's not funny or the book isn't funny? People need to know ...

Dave Wyble said...

So, is Going Native:
1) one of your favorite books
2) not written by the Steven Wright who is a stand-up comedian
3) not funny

Or is Going Native:
1) one of your favorite books
2) not written by the Steven Wright who is:
2a) a stand-up comedian
2b) not funny

It is possible you don't think Steven Wright is funny. I'm hoping I just read it wrong.

Piraro said...

Sorry, didn't mean to be unclear about the various Stephen/Steven Wrights. I love the book but it is not funny. I love Steven Wright, who is very funny.