Stinging Whiskers

(To view this cartoon as large and clear as a plexiglass barn, click on a bee.)

Bizarro is brought to you today by Hirsute Alphabet.

I've always been fascinated by any attempt to build a beard out of something other than facial hair. Who isn't, am I right? Waffle beards, wax beards, carpet goatees, sideburns of mango skins, they're all amazing in their own right. But the top of the heap, as far as replacement facial hair substances go, is live, stinging insects.

This cartoon idea came from my friend, colleague, and occasional collaborator, He Who is Known as Wayno. Wayno has a beard of earthworms, as he is allergic to bee stings and could be killed quite easily by a stunt such as the one shown here. I admire his efforts but have to say that it is not as riveting as one made of bees. In fact, it's pretty disgusting and he must lie flat on the ground at all times to keep them from just sliding off his face. Sometimes he wonders if it is even worth it.

I've read that there is a man in Australia who plans to attempt to outdo the beard of bees early next year with a mustache made of sharks. Let's all wish him well.

To see more art by Wayno, a genuinely nice man whom you can feel good about supporting, go to these places:
Nice Butts
Hot Chicks
Total Hunks