Friday, January 21, 2011


Bizarro is brought to you today by Free Thinkers.

I've been remiss in my posting this week so here's a batch of cartoons to catch us up. Do we have to discuss them all in detail? I'm not convinced we do.

The fly cartoon that kicks off today's show was very popular with readers according to emails and comments I've received. What can we deduce from this? That my readers are into poop jokes. It makes a cartoonist proud.

Here's a very weird and slightly disturbing cartoon about a pregnant woman. What does it mean? Why does her uterus have a voice mail system? I'd be happy to tell you if I knew.

As a result of many emails from various folks, I do know that this cartoon about a seeing-eye dog for the colorblind is funny albeit totally impossible. Dogs don't see color the way humans do so they would be pretty useless at this task. That's just one of the many reasons this is a cartoon and not an illustration in a medical textbook. Don't take these things so seriously, kids.

Static electricity is always funny, especially when it has to do with embarrassing undergarments. Enough said.

Years ago I had an obese doctor who smoked in the office between seeing patients. You could see him down the hall in his office puffing away. I always thought it was funny. You don't have to actually practice good advice to give it. That's the lesson I hope you take away from this cartoon.

Not that my cartoons are about teaching, they're not. In fact, don't follow any advice I give in a cartoon, I don't want to be responsible for your life. If you can read a cartoon, you have a brain. Learn to use it responsibly and things will go better for you. Most of my readers are already independent thinkers so I realize I'm preaching to the choir. I'm just talking to that one guy somewhere who is taping my cartoons to his walls every day, studying them, trying to spot patterns and messages, devising a path by which to live his life, running a piece of red yarn from one pushpin to another creating a giant mess that will later mystify detectives when they are investigating his gruesome crimes. Yes, you know who you are. Stop it.


Anonymous said...

I don't get the "poop joke" in the "number 2" cartoon.

raceynora said...

Excellent - every one!

Prospero said...

Dan - saw this today on Copyranter and had to share with you (for obvious reasons)

Richard Shumberger said...

Is there some sort of coordination between you and Dave Coverly? In the Tulsa World they ran the static electricity strip on the same day, and since they are side-by-side, the static guy from Speedbump, , appeared to be shooting the static into your strip. Intentional or not?

Piraro said...

@Anonymous...#2 is a polite way of referring to defecation. Menus at Chinese restaurants usually number the dishes. So the fly is asking for a piece of shit, which flies are attracted to.

@Richard, never coordinated. Dave and I have no way of knowing who will publish our cartoons in what order or whether we'll be next to each other or even appear in the same papers. I don't keep up with Speed Bump so I didn't know about this coincidence. Very funny, thanks for telling me about it. These things happen all the time and we cartoonists get lots of questions like yours. :o)

Piraro said...

@Prospero...LOVE that photo. I'm so envious of that last name. How cool would it be to just be born with that wacky name?

Matthew said...

Dan, I'm a big fan of your comics, and am glad they are in the newspaper I get weekdays at school. The fly in the restaurant was funny, and I quite enjoyed the color-blind dog joke. I did know that dogs are color-blind, which just adds to the situation.

I also really liked your 'Will Wake for Food' on the airplane comic. I go to school in PA, but live in ME, so I fly a few times a year for breaks. I hate wanting to rest my eyes, or become absorbed in the TV for the attendant to just brush by me.

Keep it up!

Italian-who-only-wears-cotton-shirts said...

The static electricity one is hilarious and very American - I suppose it could only happen with polyester shirts?

ojeano said...

I'm not as crazy about poop jokes as I am about fly jokes. Still, any time someone refers to the number two I think of poop, but I don't always realize it. That's why *I* laughed at that one.

As always, thank you!

PS: You wrote "red yard" instead of "red yarn." What ever happened to "Flash Forward" anyway? I bet the producers got cocky and hired cheaper writers.

Tim said...

Her uterus doesn't have voice mail - the doctor has reached her answering cervix.

Ba-doom-ching! Thanks a lot folks, I'll be here all week.