Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Zombie Minimum Daily Dietary Requirements

Bizarro is brought to you today by King of the Brain-Eating Zombies.

Followers of this blog may know that I have had a relationship with a teenage boy for a few years now. But before you go "tweeting" that, let me say that this relationship is not illicit, illegal or inappropriate in any way. He's just a funny kid who sends me cartoon ideas from time to time. His name is Victor or Vance or something, I can never remember, and he just started college somewhere on the East Coast. Or maybe Canada.

I've posted about him before and even included some pics of him and his family visiting Bizarro International Headquarters in Brooklyn earlier this year.

That's a long-winded introduction to my next point, which is that Victor suggested to me the idea of a zombie who craved bran instead of brains and I made this cartoon out of it. Thanks, Victor (Vernon?), good luck in school. (Or was it jail?)

In other news, a reader of Bizarro saw this cartoon in the newspaper (an outdated mode of communication from the 1900s which facilitates the dissemination of facts to the public) and sent me the following haiku:

The vegan zombie
Cares not for sweet grey matter
They cry out for "grains"

It's funny because it's true. Or at least I assume it is true. I'm a vegan but not a zombie, so I can only be half sure.

Until tomorrow...live each day as though it is your last (but you don't know it is your last, otherwise you might spend all your money, punch your boss in the neck, and admit to your wife that you banged her sister in the pool house at that party that one time.)


Unknown said...

Dan: Glenn Beck shares the title of "Zombie King" with Michael Moore and Rush Limbaugh.

doug nicodemus said...

speaking of treating everyday as your last


...your Victor said...

This Victor guy is a genius!!

Dorothy Ramirez/Ramses said...

In the family portrait, I am the one in blue. (Dig the 'stash. Quite groovy on a chicky-poo).
Love, Delores (or whatever my name is this week... AKA female parental unit of said cool teen...)